9. Evaluate the situation.
If you removed all of the negative self-talk from your head, are there situations that titillate you, even a little? Some guys feel the need to get over the idea of feeling threatened by a woman who is kinkier than he is. Some are afraid of being judged by others if they ever found out and some, well… they are just not wired that way.
“Once you’ve looked at your fears, I always suggest trying something new. If you don’t like it, you can always communicate that. I find that most people don’t know what they are missing, though. Once you can learn to open up sexually, often times you feel emotionally more connected as well just by sharing the experience,” says Van Kirk.